jasonandjessica.org :: Countdown to a Wedding

How To Purchase The Perfect Engagement Ring Without Ripping Out All Of Your Hair

Wednesday, October 29th, 2003 [edit]

There are so many things that go into purchasing a ring. It’s amazing the hoops that one jumps through. If done right, it’s completely worth it.

But, it isn’t designed for the weak at heart. With the proper planning — it can all come together with as little headache as possible. Let me tell you the things I’ve learned in the last few months.

It isn’t to be taken lightly. I’m convinced that the girl you’re asking to be your bride will know if you picked up the ring at Ray’s Discount Jewelry and Tires on your way to pick her up for the evening. Things to consider:

Figure out what type of ring you want.

Don’t feel bad if you have no idea when you start. It’s okay. Guys and girls are different. Women have this inherent knowledge. The key is to know your girlfriend well enough to get a handle on her tastes. Listen to her, for God’s sake. She’ll tell you what she wants if you’ll just listen.

Figure out what you can spend. Figure out what you want to spend.

Some might argue that these numbers should line up perfectly. They might, but they might not. Look around for rough numbers on how much the ring you want to buy costs. Remember to breathe. I know, it’s ridiculous.

Shop around for a jeweler, not jewelry.

Do your homework. Find a reputable jeweler near you. Make these people your friend. They can help you out so much. Make these people your close friend. Make them invest themselves personally in this decision. Make them want to give you the perfect thing.

Jewelers respect someone who isn’t willing to settle. You’re willing to drop a huge amount of money on a ring, they should be willing to help in any way possible. If not, leave. Find another. They’re everywhere.

After you’ve found a jeweler, find a stone.

Stone comes first, then setting. I was looking for a diamond, so modify these rules if you’re looking for something else. Diamonds vary wildly. Never purchase anything that isn’t certified. Look at it under a microscope.

I stopped by my jeweler every Tuesday and Thursday for more than a month to inspect new stones they’d received. The manager would filter out all of his diamonds based on his knowledge about me, so I’d look at four to six stones a visit. We would discuss them and it allowed him to refine his search.

After you find a stone, pick a setting.

For me, this was significantly easier. I don’t have tons of advice, but use your knowledge of her to guide your decision. This is also one of the few opportunities to negotiate price. Your jeweler will have more flexibility in the setting cost (usually) than with the stone cost.

Tada!

Plan on it taking longer than you would like. It’s worth it — if it is done right.